So me and Mr. P my current boyfriend are now talking marriage. We have talked about it for the past few months and seemed to have come to the conclusion that that is what we both want sometime in the near future.
I have a wonderful son from a previous marriage who happens to be the best thing that has ever happened to me. Due to my previous frequent travels pursuing further education and employment I opted to leave my son with my parents. It has been a year since I returned and just a few months since I found employment stability. I have plans of moving my son back here at the end of this year so we can start our exciting journey called life together.
When Mr. P moved to India, I was very supportive of the idea. We discussed us and how we shall cope with the distance and we were both in for it no matter what. Then we got to the point of discussing marriage and India and whether I would move. Same story, we were both agreeable to the fact that it would not be viable for me to move at this point in my career to go and be a housewife. Besides he could take leave every three months to come home to us and was hoping to spend just two years in that employment.
Yesterday the tables turned, apparently he would prefer I move after we get married which we were planning to do sometime early next year.
So what happens to my career? To that transition I was hoping to give my son in order for him and Mr.P to get acquainted? To the earlier plans of me not moving immediately but later? Is this worth it?
When I was married previously, I was not financially independent and God knows how that was a major problem for me. I am not used to sitting and waiting on a man to do everything for me. And I know for sure that over time the whole idea of being a housewife wears one down emotionally especially if you are used to working and making some good earnings out of it. I also don't have the best examples of women who have foregone their careers to get married and live happily thereafter. Maybe I just don't understand the mechanics of marriage.
He says we should make sacrifices, but clearly in this case it is me making the sacrifice. His career is high flying, I am just past my baby steps in mine and there is a young man who needs his mom's unwavering attention.
We need to get back to the drawing table.
I have a wonderful son from a previous marriage who happens to be the best thing that has ever happened to me. Due to my previous frequent travels pursuing further education and employment I opted to leave my son with my parents. It has been a year since I returned and just a few months since I found employment stability. I have plans of moving my son back here at the end of this year so we can start our exciting journey called life together.
When Mr. P moved to India, I was very supportive of the idea. We discussed us and how we shall cope with the distance and we were both in for it no matter what. Then we got to the point of discussing marriage and India and whether I would move. Same story, we were both agreeable to the fact that it would not be viable for me to move at this point in my career to go and be a housewife. Besides he could take leave every three months to come home to us and was hoping to spend just two years in that employment.
Yesterday the tables turned, apparently he would prefer I move after we get married which we were planning to do sometime early next year.
So what happens to my career? To that transition I was hoping to give my son in order for him and Mr.P to get acquainted? To the earlier plans of me not moving immediately but later? Is this worth it?
When I was married previously, I was not financially independent and God knows how that was a major problem for me. I am not used to sitting and waiting on a man to do everything for me. And I know for sure that over time the whole idea of being a housewife wears one down emotionally especially if you are used to working and making some good earnings out of it. I also don't have the best examples of women who have foregone their careers to get married and live happily thereafter. Maybe I just don't understand the mechanics of marriage.
He says we should make sacrifices, but clearly in this case it is me making the sacrifice. His career is high flying, I am just past my baby steps in mine and there is a young man who needs his mom's unwavering attention.
We need to get back to the drawing table.
